Wife Life

August 15, 2018

This month my husband and I celebrated our 3rd anniversary. Have you guys ever heard the saying that the first three years of marriage are the hardest? Who came up with that? I was thinking it was probably someone who did it the more traditional way. We've already been together 10+ years, we have children, we live together. Isn't that how most of us are doing it these days?  I'm not saying its right or wrong, but I will say I tried it the "right" way the first time and I couldn't have been more WRONG. Does marriage really change anything if you've already been living together as a married couple? I started looking up the reasons why people say the first three years are the hardest. Some believe its really the 1st year or the first 2 years, but 3 is the most common. The reasons listed are below:

 

~ Household Bickering 

~ Money

~Baby Obsession

~You don't do the things you used to do

~In-Laws

 

~Bordom 

~Sex-pectations

~Loss of identity

~Change in appearance 

 

Getting married was never a negative for us but we just weren't in a rush. It always seemed like it was more of an issue for some of our family members than it was for us. Even when we got engaged we still waited 2 years before actually saying "I do." As I look back over the years and over this list I'm so thankful that we did it "our way." I can definitely see the issues on the list being problematic for a couple just starting out. In our case we were able to deal with some of them before saying our vows, and I believe we are stronger because of it. Things did change between us these past three years but for the better. I can tell that we're closer, we talk more about things we would kind of brush off before, we definitely have each others backs like never before, and we just feel more like a solid unit. My husband and I have gotten asked many times about relationship advice. At least once a month one of us has a friend or family member coming over to vent. We have our problems too just like everyone else, but I think the fact that we have made it all these years, and we're still very close makes them feel comfortable seeking advice from us. Below I put together a list of our best marriage advice for getting through the first 3 years. Read and let me know what you think.

 

~Keep other people out of your business

~Keep your business off social media

~If you are going to seek advice or vent to someone be mindful of who you're getting advice from 

~Be respectful to each other

~Be very clear on your feelings and expectations, talk about them often because they will change as your relationship grows 

~Give each other space, it's good to miss each other

~Make date nights mandatory

~Sex is important in a marriage....HAVE LOTS OF IT & MAKE IT FUN!

 

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